Sensual?

Today I pulled the Goddess Oshun from my oracle deck.  She's a beautiful Goddess from the African culture.  She's all about sensuality.

What does that mean??  Being sensual?  To me it's a way that I feel.  I can feel sensual when I hear a beautiful piece of music and start moving my body.  Or it can be walking down town with a sexy pair of underwear/bra on underneath my "business" clothes.

A treat I did for me tonight was have my hair cut/styled by Natasja!  I have been growing my hair out, and haven't had it cut since July.  It was a wonderful experience.  I feel so amazing, my hair is so "flippy" (I promise it's a  stylist's term).  She told me exactly what she was going to do, before she did anything. 

When we were done, I felt amazing, sensual, foxy, and powerful.  Yes!  You can be all those things and many more in one moment!  Our power as women comes from our core, from our place of our sensual essence.  Which is our reproductive region, or orange chakra for those of you who study Reiki.  Breathe into that sensual essence!  And celebrate it!

Being in Natasja's chair reminded me of all those things.  That I am a sensual being.  And so are you!  I invite you to put on a wonderful piece of music perhaps something without words, and move your body to the beat.  Don't think about what you are doing, just move your body!

I've been listening to some 'favourite' songs on you-tube find below one I forgot about.  This song has powerful words!

Be your sensual Goddess self!  You deserve it!  Because you are worth it!

4:30am!?!? POWER

Okay, so I awake at 4:30am this morning and can't seem to get back to bed......so I'd thought I would come and sit here at my computer and do a blog post.  Typing on feelings of what ever is coming up in the moment.

This past weekend I've done a lot of reflecting on what is, and what isn't.  The word power has been coming up lots.  Specifically the word self power.  I came to the realization a few days ago now, that this self power that I have is within me, and I'm afraid of it. 

I shouldn't be afraid of it though, I should embrace it and let it move in me and through me.  It's my gift to share with the world.  I can remember a few years ago now roughly summer of 2007, being in a workshop all about finding your personal power.  I was involved in one of the daily activities that was quite physical using martial arts as a metaphor for life.  One of the staff in the event came over to me from across the large room where we were doing some "bag" work with partners.  He said to me that he could feel my intensity/power from across the room and had to come over to see who it was.  He was so surprised that it was me.

Two quotes that I saw/heard this weekend are all about personal power.  One is from my dear Goddess Sister Lee from http://www.simpleeserene.com/  She posted:  "And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than  the risk it took to blossom. - Anats Nin"  And the other that I heard on the great movie The Secret "There's a power in me, that is greater than the world itself."

When I read the fist quote, I cried.  Some friends of mine have suggested that perhaps the reason for my health issues right now are because they are emotional.  That I'm holding onto something too tight.  I do feel myself blossoming open, to my full ME.  It's a scary/good feeling.  Really showing up to being me, to shining my light for the world.  I need to relax and and be open to all the possibilities.  Stand in my power and showing up to my own party.  For life is one big party.   Taking risks, asking for help even for me is a risk, reaching out to others and letting others in to help me is something I continue to work on daily!

I also am going to do things that help lower my stress in my life.  By being in the company of others, making in person connections with friends.  Dancing just for the sake of dancing around in my living room.  Also arranging once a month for an energy body treatment from another dear Goddess Sister Nadine.  She is an amazing Goddess who works her magic on my body with massage and reiki.

The second quote from the movie "The Secret" spoke to my heart again.  I watch the movie a few times a year, and every time I get something different out of it.  This time it was all about personal power.  I am feeling this power and grounding the energy all at the same time.

Find below a beautiful video/song by Jana Stanfield.  It's called If I Were Brave.  Two of my dear friends, Goddess Sisters are in this video.  They are brave!



I just shuffled my Goddess Oracle deck, and guess who flipped over?  Lilith!  She's the Goddess of Power!  Wow!  I love this Goddess, she was the first wife of Adam, and didn't want to eat the forbidden fruit to be controlled by Adam, so she fled. 

Find below a video slide show all about this amazing Goddess!



So in closing, I ask you Sister, will you stand in your own power?  Let others help you?  And be YOU!

powerful experience

It's almost 1:40am on Sunday the spring equinox is here.   I saw a peak of the moon for a few seconds before she went back behind  the clouds as it is snowing here tonight in Calgary.   I had left my computer to go to bed.  When I got to my room, I all of a sudden instead of getting into my bed, sat down at the desk and wrote out a list of words.  Those words you will find below in this message that flowed out of my fingers so easily onto the paper.  This tip I learnt from a dear friend of mine while attending her workshop a couple of weeks ago about building authentic relationships.

In my life there are many things that I know I have control over.  To realize that I have a power within me that is bigger than the Universe its self is a pretty thrilling experience.  I have big dreams that are grand and make me laugh and buzz with energy when I think about them.

To dance through my life loving everything about my life right now in this moment is a beautiful thing.  Letting spirit be my guide right now to trust that everything will work out perfectly.  I have the burning passion to inspire others around me.  My goal is to awaken every woman on the planet to see that they are a Goddess!

Beauty comes in so many forms.  Beauty comes from within.  I am beautiful, my large breasts, wide hips and full belly.  I am wise, I have so much to share in this world.  I will always tell a child they are wise, wonderful and smart.  For they are our future.

Abundance is everywhere.  We just have to look.  Some of the happiest people on the planet live in a shack with no running water or a bed to call their own.  Yet they create magic every day for themselves.  I create magic in the way I move my body, my dance takes me everywhere I can imagine.  On the wings of the divine I can fly as high as I want.  There is no limit on how high I can soar!

With the music playing right to my heart where I can feel it deep in my soul there are no boundaries.  The world is my oyster I have the power to create it.

Outrageous joy is how I am feeling in this moment.  There are always guardian angels surrounding me and showing me the way to love.  Outside the moon is full and abundant with bright energy that also reminds me that I'm not alone.

Moon energy

Well, here we are at another Saturday!  What another crazy week I had!  Must be all the fun moon energy that is abundant right now!

On Monday I was actually sick home from work.  I had done some de-cluttering the night before, about an hour after, I was hit down with a fever, that carried over to Monday.

Friends of mine said it might have been from all the energy that I moved.  I threw out a ton of stuff, and also have donated things, put things out for "free take me" as well.  Everything I put outside were things weren't serving me any more.

On Wednesday evening after work, I had a beautiful connection with a brilliant Goddess.  We visited, talked about a ton of stuff till when I said I should probably go home this Goddess looked at me and said "yes, and don't look at the clock!"  It was 2am!  Wow!  What an amazing time of connection we had.  I gifted her with a CD that I had made of inspirational music/songs.

Thursday after my "9 - 5" job was an evening that I don't think I'll forget for a long while.  I was at the E-WomenNetwork Calgary dinner event.  Wow!  An amazing evening of huge heart connections with some Goddesses that I have come to know, love, and trust.  As well as one lone Warrior, in the group.  He was our presenter for the night.  Darren spoke about cash flow, dreams, and many other amazing and wonderful things.  Darren and I actually know each other, we met at a seminar a few years ago.  It was wonderful to see him again.

I must say though, that the most amazing, loving connection happened after dinner and Darren speaking.  An outstanding Sister Goddess who I treasure like a big sister, physically connected with me.  She had one hand at my heart, and the other at my belly.  What happened next is almost impossible to describe.  We were both hit with an energy buzz that was HUGE!  My heart was bursting with heat/energy, and my belly felt like it was on fire.  We stayed that way for a long time, not sure how much time passed.  I was crying, and doing my best to stay grounded.  It was so magical.  What we spoke about I'm not going to share, it was between her and I.

The moon is so full tonight, can't see it though due to the cloud coverage in the city.  I think one of the reasons why my Sister Goddess and I had such a strong connection was due to the fact that the moon's energy is very powerful right now.

The moon has lots of energy and power.  Do you ever tap into your own power?  Your own strength?  I know it's something I continually work on each day.  Some days its easier than others.  Let's do this together Goddess....we are powerful.  Let's create magic!

Have you felt the power of the moon?  Have you felt the power of you?

Selfhood and Compassion

Artemis Goddess of Selfhood

This morning during a week day, I sit at a coffee shop getting an opportunity to do some blogging.  I wish I could do this every morning, get up on my own time, head to a local coffee shop get a tea and do some blogging each morning. 

There has been so much going on in the world.  With the Great Mother being uneasy in the region of Japan being the latest unrest of the Great Mother.  I turned to my Goddess Oracle deck this morning for some comfort in what can I do.  Here's who flipped over in my pile today.  Artemis and Kuan Yin.  Interesting, very interesting.  Artemis has always been a favourite Goddess of mine, she's all about being free, living her passion(s), caring for the animals and forests.  First let me reflect more on Artemis......

In Amy Sophia M's book on page 26 from The Goddess Oracle is a poem:

I am who I am
and I know who I am
I can take care of myself
under all circumstances
and I can let others care for me
I can choose
There is no authority
higher than my own
my powers of discernment are finely honed
I am autonomous
I am free from the influence
of other's opinions
I am able to separate
that which needs separation
so a clear decision
can  be reached
I think for myself
I set my sights
and aim my bow
my arrows always find their mark.

It's interesting, selfhood, Artemis also speaks to me about giving time to me.  Asking me if I've been giving so much to others that I forget about myself.  Which is true.  I believe that part of the reason for me getting ill on Sunday/Monday is that I have been giving so much to others, that I forgot about myself.  Yesterday I slept almost the entire day away.

She also speaks to me about her arrow, and firing arrows to dreams.  I wrote about this already, it's huge though, I saw the power of love and dreams coming true for a friend of mine.  She didn't give up, and neither did we, making this wish/dream come true for a friend of a friend.  To live my passion, my dream for the world I know I'm doing the right thing.  My friend Lee wrote on her facebook status page this morning about what is your wish?  I was unable to answer her when I first saw her message. 

Now though, I'm starting to dream big again.  One dream of mine is to travel to all 3 points of this beautiful country of mine.  I'm close, I've been to Vancouver (need to get to Victoria, and Tofino), Peggy's Cove in Nova Scotia (need to get to St. John's NFLD), the one up north is the tricky one I wish to get to Tuk-tu-uk-tuk in the N.W.T.

Another to travel to the Goddess Sacred sites of England and Ireland, to where the Lady of the Lake once lived.  To visit where the fairy's live, and dance in the magic of it all!

Other dreams I have are to meet specific people in person Sierra Bender (an awesome Goddess who wrote a book called Goddess To The Core), Wayne Dyer, Doreen Virtue, Oprah, Dr. Phil, Jillian Michaels.

I have business goals/dreams to for Awakening Goddess as well.  To have more days like today, to sit in a coffee shop and blog, write, connect via social media with others.  To be able to have enough income from Awakening Goddess to have my 2 bedroom apartment to myself again, to be able to cut down my 9 - 5 job and work part time 3 days a week no evenings.   To be in front of  large groups of women sharing my story, inspiring other women that they do have power, they are sensual. 

It's funny as I sit here just finishing writing this paragraph, I'm buzzing with energy, almost on the verge of  tears. All these dreams will come true, I believe it is so!

What are your big dreams?  Let your imagination go, and dream big!

Kuan Yin, Goddess of Compassion

Kuan Yin....similar to Artemis in a way is all about compassion.  Reminding me to have compassion for self, is what I am taking away from this reading.  I have plenty of compassion for other giving so much to others, that I forget to give to myself, to show compassion to myself.

Kuan Yin is a powerful Goddess from the East, she is seen as the "Mother Mary" in the catholic traditions from the West.  Many call to her for compassion for the world.  And frankly I think it's needed right now, with the unrest of the Great Mother in Kuan Yin's home land.

The Great Mother is shaking things up, she wants us to wake up!  She wants us to show up and live. 

Will you do that Sister?  Will you wake up with me, and show up to live?!?

RANGO's teachings

On Friday night, I took myself out for a movie date.  I went and saw the movie RANGO, a kids movie with Johny Depp as the main character/voice.  It had a great story with an even better message.

The message is:  Don't Walk Out Of Your Own STORY!  You are the creator of your own story.  If you walk out of it, then what will happen?  And who you are in your story is important as well.  You Sister are the Heroine!  You are the creator!  You are POWERFUL!!!

I know for me in my life there has been a couple of times where I wanted to walk out of my own story even with out knowing it fully.  I can remember something my Dad told me about when I was first born, the nurses at the NICU had to remind me to keep breathing.  I would stop breathing because my lungs weren't fully developed.  But there was something in me that was stronger.  The doctors told my parents that I would always be small and petite.  Hah!  Were they wrong!  That's like saying that your daughter will not amount to much, and not live her life.  And the doctors thought that about me, I was baptized and not expected to live past 24hrs.

As I grew into adulthood life threw me different curve balls where I could have easily walked away from creating my story.  Being in the hospital 7 years ago with having to under go emergency surgery to remove a cyst the size of a large grapefruit was a very low time in my life.  At one point I thought of walking out of my story (going into a shell/depression and not fully living).  With love and support from family and friends I didn't.  I learned how to ask for help during my recovery.

Now seven years later, it almost feels like a re birthing of sorts for me.  I've had many shifts take place since January.  I've been taking amazing steps to keep going forward in life.  To live my life.  I am creating my own story as the heroine, the creator, the one who says what is so.  It's a thrilling experience, meaning it's scary good! 

I don't really care what others think of me either, I have some critics/negative people who've told me it can't be done.  Or others have said stop you are shining too bright, it's too much.  I know what I am doing on this earth is a good thing, it's needed in the world.  Many women that I've come in contact with and all over the world are not living their Awakened Goddess selves. 

Women connecting with their Awakened Goddess selves, connecting with heart with other women.  Getting into their bodies and moving them in sacred body movement.  It's a healing experience to move our bodies, even if it's a slight bounce/sway to a good piece of music that you love!  I know I've been dancing to some music and all of a sudden the tears will just start to flow, it's a healing it's a release for me.  Showing up moment to moment.

Find below a piece of music with amazing words that I love, it's by Natasha Bedingfield called "Unwritten", about how your life is not written yet, you have the control to do so!





So remember, don't walk out of your own story!  You are the heroine in your own story.  It has yet to be created!!!

Do you believe in Miracles?




The master dream maker!!

 
Wow!  What a roller coaster of emotions this week has been!  Started off with taking part in a seminar all about building authentic relationships.  Where I got to re-meet some amazing women who are all brilliant and radiant!  The group was lead by my dear Goddess Sister friend Lee.  She rocked! 

My physical pain had been non existent for about 7 days, and it came back on Monday, and hasn't left.  I had a skype session with one of my mentors this morning and it really helped.  Getting in touch with my pain in my body and letting myself feel, dream, and connect.  Still have the physical pain, I also seem clearer on my direction and goals.

I've been listening over and over again to my "inspirational" play list on my I-Tunes.  It really helps me keep believing in my passion and purpose.  Right now in this moment is KT Tunsel "Suddenly I see".  A great song!




Toward the end of the week, Lee posted something on her facebook page about a friend of hers.  This friend is a dear soul, a brilliant woman, who is living with a terminal illness.  It is this friend's dying wish to have Michael Buble sing to her in person or via video/skype.  She launched a huge social media push to have Michael sing to honour this wish.  I was apart of the push of love to make it happen.  I posted on facebook and twitter like crazy as much as I could.  To the point where my biological Sister said it was a little over whelming.  If a dear friend says to you that she has a friend who is dying of a terminal illness and has a last wish, will you help make it happen any way you can?  Even if others tell you you are doing to much, or to slow down, or it's over whelming?  I am so happy to announce that in less than 24hrs Michael heard our wish, and sent a video from Hong Kong to her.  I do believe that miracles do come true.  That dreams do come true. 




So many emotions come over me when I think of what took place.  Believe in dreams, believe in miracles, asking for help, asking for what you want.

I've always believed in dreams and miracles.  I sit here today as a miracle child.  Born 3 months early, weighing in at 1 pound 12 ounces, not expected to live 24hrs.  I am here today at 34 years of age living!



Asking for help, for what I want, is still something I continue to work on.  It could be as easy as asking someone for help to clean up a water leak mess in my apartment.  I struggled asking my room mate to help me clean up the mess!  Or it can be big like asking for help after being in the hospital for emergency surgery, where I couldn't do my own grocery shopping or even drive places on my own.  I had to ask for help for everything.

So Goddess, I ask you, do you believe in miracles?  Do you remember to ask for help?

Acts of Kindness

I had an interesting day yesterday, was attending an all day seminar/workshop with all of my co-workers.  It was about culture and spirituality.  How we fit it into our working environment.  I work for an organization here in Calgary that is all first nations/metis staff.  I am one of the only white people working for the organization.

So for most of the day I sat and was an observer, didn't speak hardly at all.  The first thing we did was a pipe ceremony, I've never participated in a pipe ceremony before.  It was wonderful to be a part of it.  Women sititng on one side in long skirts, men on the other.  There were four people sitting at the front of the circle at an alter made of blankets and other special symbols.  Each person at the front of the circle did their own cleansing/smudging of their pipe.  Prayers were said and then the pipes were all passed around, if you didn't chose to smoke that was okay, we were to just put the lips of the pipe to our sides of our body, our heart and the other side of our chest.  It was a wonderful experience to be apart of.

I learned about the history of the organization and then we all after lunch had the opportunity to speak about different things related to the culture and spirituality of our different groups.  I heard things like do I belong, am I native enough from others.  I really started to doubt myself working for the organization.  I thought maybe I didn't belong because I'm not native, I have lots to learn about the culture and spirituality.

When I did choose to speak I only spoke the positve part that I was thinking.  Because I also heard things like being kind.  I spoke about that.  Starting in the Parent Link centre where I am now back in August has been an adjustment.  My co-workers I acknowledged in my speaking and said that they have been so kind and accepting of me, even with all my quirks.  I thanked everyone for allowing me to be there, to participate in the ceremony earlier in the morning.  Being non native I feel very honoured and blessed to be working with such a great organization.

When I got home yesterday, I took myself out for supper.  I had a gift certificate that I was gifted with from an event about a week ago.  When there, I enjoyed my meal, and observing the others around me.  I saw a table of six, two parents and four children.  I called the server over and said that I wanted to put a $20 payment on their bill.  The server figured it out and said sure.  When he went to the table of six and gave them their bill, he told them that $20 had been taken off  by me.  They all stared at me and the husband even stood up and looked at me.  The husband came over and asked if we knew each other.  I said no we don't.  I explained the "pay it forward" or "random acts of kindness" to him.  He went back to his table and explained it to his family.

On the way out, the family all came by and said thank you.  I recieved their thank you, and just asked each one of them to pay it forward.  Encouraging them to do it for someone they don't know.  It was a wonderful experience to witness. 

So Sister, I encourage you, do a random act of kindness for someone you see this weekend.  It might just change the course of their life!

Find  below a video about kindness.  I found it on you-tube!

Making Choices

I've not written in a while, I've been focusing on my health and looking after some health concerns.  Tonight I'm watching The Biggest Loser.  I love the show, the people on the show are so real, they don't hide anything. 

I've been on a long journey of doing my best to live healthier.  I recently stepped on a scale a few weeks ago, and was upset when I saw what the number was.  I have to keep reminding myself that it's just a number.  I've put on 20 pounds, kinda like starting back at the beginning.

Then I started thinking, feeling, and listening to my heart.  Over the past few months I've been really happy.  I've been happy in my heart, emotionally and mentally.  I've been having so many good days, I've been open to all the doors of opportunities that have come my way for my business Awakening Goddess.  There are so many wonderful women to thank.  Everyone is so special to me, I have chosen to honour a small handful here.  In no particular order because they are all #1 in my mind.  The amazing Miss Lee from SimpLee Serene the spunky Miss Jo from e-women, my insultant Goddess Miss Lynne from HandlerInc, my "Amazon Queen" Miss Karen the Enlightened Love Coach, the lively Miss Jenn from systems-girl, the sparkly Miss Colette from Soulmate Relationships, and the sassy Miss Sandra from Calgary Goddesses.  Each of these above women have been there for me, helped me so much, showed me many doors of opportunities that I've opened and stepped  through them all.

I am choosing to be happy, choosing to live my life.  I believe that when the heart is emotionally happy and the brain is mentally happy that the body will follow.  I know I'll keep going on my physical happiness, it's a process, just like the other two, sometimes there are bumps in the road to over come. 

I know I'll get over the  bumps in the road with believing in myself, and continue to love myself.  Life is a roller coaster, twists and turns, mountains to climb, and lots to scream and be outrageously joyful about!

I ask you Sister, what are you choosing today?  You have the power to choose, which path are you choosing?  Life might not always be easy, but with love and support from others as well as believing in yourself you will get through!